Was that funny ??

I am so jobless these days. "Vella" is the word. I have fever, I am bored, bored to write anything. My previous post sucked, I know :P.. I mean where have those witty posts disappeared you may ask? I ask myself that too..Then Kirti comes up with a contest and I come with something trashy...And people laugh at it :P..Well for those of you who haven't read it ...Kirti had come with some excerpts of a narrative and all we had to do was to complete it and make it a story.Here's what I came up with ....

"Ruko"! she shouted as she ran behind the bus. "Stop!"

But it was of no use, the bus sped off, leaving her huffing and puffing in a cloud of dust. She stopped, sighed and threw her bag on the road. How would she get to work NOW?!

"Madam! Handbag you want? Sandal?" a little urchin asked with a cheeky grin.

"Nahi nahi, paise nahi hain. No money.” came her automatic response. She was used to these beggars and peddlers by now.

"Madam Ji, aap se paise maange kya maine? Aap item toh dekho."

She took a closer look at the cart in the child's hand. It seemed to contain an assortment of oddities. One golden sandal, a blue handbag with no strap, a shiny purple button, a frayed piece of ribbon...


These were her excerpts...we had to complete the story from here on ….. So from here on it’s my version of how the story would move…


With a curious look she took the handbag from the cart, it was so similar to the handbag she had just thrown on to the ground, except that her bag had a strap to it.

“Ye kitne ka hain”?

“Sirf Yahin chayiye madam”? He still had that cheeky grin on his face.

Tum chup chap batao nahin toh …..

Her phone started ringing

“The child troubling you Kavita eh? You are getting late my dear, aren’t you?”

“Who’s this?”

Ha! Do you think I am gonna tell you …Anyways Listen …..Take all the things from him. And give him a hundred bucks. Poor kid. We have already paid him 500. Look at him. Doesn’t he look really happy?

Who the ……??

Look up to your right, Will you?

As Kavita looked up she saw her good friend standing at the terrace of a nearby building.A gun pointing to his forehead.

“Naman”

Now you know what to do? Do As I say.

Kavita finally gave in.

Ok now what?

Eh? Good Question.

You didn’t get a bus, did you? Delhi I tell ya. But hey no problem. Take that rickshaw to your left. The poor guy hasn’t got a customer so far. He will be glad to take you to Lodhi Gate.

As she reached Lodhi gate, now what?

“Hello Hello”

The man had disconnected.

The phone rang again. This time it was naman.

“Kavita don’t do anything what these people say …go straight to your office plzz.pl…”

“Eh? Good try Naman Sorry for the disconnection Sweety. The Building to the left of CCD. Somebody will be glad to see you in B-44.”

As Kavita rang the bell, nobody responded. The Door was already open.

“There’s no one here.”

“I know.”

“What?”

“Well what is it near the wall hanging on the left of the television that you see?”

“A Calendar.”

“And what’s the month?”

“What the….. *Shit*”

A loud mixture of Laughs chuckles and giggles filled the room.

Kavita wasn’t too amused.

P.S : A special Thanks to Kirti …If you hadn’t provided the excerpts I wouldn’t have been able to come up with this …I actually didn’t wanna post this here in my blog but as I said I had to come up with something "funny"….It was time…Sowwie :P

"Khichdi" of a Conversation

A Chat with Miss Express the other day

Me: srcyyyyyyyy src!

She: haha

Me: that was Khichdi's hansa ben :-P

She: aree, any1 4m khichdi would say that :-D

Me: khaana khake jaana huh! :D

She: NOOOO!!!!

Its hello, how are? Khana khake jaana ha :-P

Me: Yeah Right… :-P

She: I know, as always

Me: arre tu toh gadhi hain Gadhii :-D

She: :-D, but prafull is the epitome of stupidity and the way he explains every time hansa has a doubt is brilliant.

Me: Yeah like… main hoon naa :-P

She: tu aisa KYU hai?

Me: Lol!

She: Aye Anurag! ‘lol’ matlab?

Me: LOL Src…. Tumhara gajre wala gajre bechte wakt kya bolta hai?

She: Wait let me give it a try.....
Gajre le lo, gajre…khushboodaar mogre k gajre le lo, lo lo gajre lo :-D
She: Gajre le lo, le lo, le lo, [laughter] oh lo! Gajre lo!

Me: HAHA! …Exactly what I thought “Lol” :-D

She: Hailot!

Me: That was not Hansa!

She: How does it matter?

Me: Arre srcyyy tu toh gadhi hain Gadhi :-D

She: Ab Bas bhi kijeyain Haan, Bapuji!

Me: Bapuji? Me? Roflmao :-D

She: Aye Anurag! Roflmao Matlab :-D

Me: Hahaha! That’s it I have had enough now. :-D

She: But it was funnn :-D

This one is kind of a tribute to one of my favorite serials on Indian Tele… Khichdi/Instant Khichdi. Loved it whenever it was on. For those of you who don't know.. it's about this mad Gujrati family where most of them or rather all of them are stupid or do stupid things which invariably leads to funny situations.The kids seem to be the smartest and the concept is hilarious. At the end, its their love for each other that puts the icing on the cake.I have kind of tried to bring in all the dialogues or slangs that were used in it. If u know any other… do share it.

P.S: I had my S.E (Software Engineering) paper today. It went reasonably well. I guess I would like to say what a typical Mumbai University Engineering Student would say or would love to say after coming out of the Examination hall….Those 3 Golden Words

“Pass Ho Jaaoungaa” :D…
Thank you Mehreen for your Help :)

Ek Ya Do? ..... Damn !!

Ok, It’s the return of the funny posts once again. I really like reading philosophical, Dark and well written type of posts but I love reading the funnier ones. I love writing them too. At the end of the day one should have a smile on their face and think at the same time and that’s what I want my writing to do. See my blog header once again.I have tinkered with it a little.It now reads “Thodi Masti Thodi Philosophy” and that’s how I like it: )
Now read this one: D .A long pending blog this.

Describing two Situations here

Situation 1:
I and one of my relative take a ric(auto) to go to particular place. And after we reach our destination it all starts….. I’ll pay, no I’ll pay…. I’ll pay...No I’ll pay… I hate these kinds of situations and normally want the other person to pay all the time: P but kya karein …One has to show some level of courtesy. And so in the end I end up paying.

Me: Kitna hua Uncle? (How much)
Autowaala: 13 rupees.
I give him a 20 rupee ka note.
He gives me a 5 rupee coin and another coin

It was quite dark at that time and so I could not make out if it was a 1 rupee or 2.

Me: Uncle, ye ek hain ya do?
Autowaala: 2 Rupaiya hain beta

My Door ka Rishtedaar didn’t waana believe him …Dikhao Dikhao….Heh! 1 Rupaiya hain …Chor Kahike…2 Rupaiyeh Chup chap waapas karo!! *Snatches the 2 Rupees from him*

Me: Why would he really do that? Does this really Happen?
He: Dude, where have you come from? Guantánamo Bay ??

*Defining Silence*

Me: Why do you ask that?

*Arghhhhh*


Situation 2:

I buy some lays some chocolates and some cakes: D
Uncle: 44 Rupees
I give him a 50 rupee note and he gives back a 5 and a 2 rupee ka coin, thinking of course that it’s a one rupee coin.

After walking a few paces I realize it. Turn back to return the coin but then think of the Situation 1 that I was in. His Mistake, why should I tell him? I turn back again and walk home: D

But this all happened because of the darn coins. Googling the whole thing up I found out that the most affected people out of this are the physically challenged ones. They are not able to make out which ones what? I Mean what was wrong with the hexagonal 2 Rupee Coin eh? At least one could make it out ….. But the new coins look so similar. In fact the back of the coin is Ditto. No Change. Well Honestly I don’t have any Problem. But the Disables do. Something has to be done...Don’t Cha Think?

I could not control my laughter when the local “ande waala” returned me this just yesterday
A 50 Paise Coin with no fingers ….Damn!!! :D

P.S: Watch Ghajini People! Watched the Paid Preview show yesterday and Aamir is superb in that.Action is a bit Bollywoodish but it ain’t really a bad movie as some critics are saying :)
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P.P.S: My last post this for the year 2008.Can’t wait for 2009.It will be the year when I graduate (hopefully: P).Get my First Job (hopefully: P) and get my first Salary (Again Hopefully: D) too.

So Here’s Wishing everyone a merry Christmas and a very Happy and a prosperous New Year :)