Was that funny ??

I am so jobless these days. "Vella" is the word. I have fever, I am bored, bored to write anything. My previous post sucked, I know :P.. I mean where have those witty posts disappeared you may ask? I ask myself that too..Then Kirti comes up with a contest and I come with something trashy...And people laugh at it :P..Well for those of you who haven't read it ...Kirti had come with some excerpts of a narrative and all we had to do was to complete it and make it a story.Here's what I came up with ....

"Ruko"! she shouted as she ran behind the bus. "Stop!"

But it was of no use, the bus sped off, leaving her huffing and puffing in a cloud of dust. She stopped, sighed and threw her bag on the road. How would she get to work NOW?!

"Madam! Handbag you want? Sandal?" a little urchin asked with a cheeky grin.

"Nahi nahi, paise nahi hain. No money.” came her automatic response. She was used to these beggars and peddlers by now.

"Madam Ji, aap se paise maange kya maine? Aap item toh dekho."

She took a closer look at the cart in the child's hand. It seemed to contain an assortment of oddities. One golden sandal, a blue handbag with no strap, a shiny purple button, a frayed piece of ribbon...


These were her excerpts...we had to complete the story from here on ….. So from here on it’s my version of how the story would move…


With a curious look she took the handbag from the cart, it was so similar to the handbag she had just thrown on to the ground, except that her bag had a strap to it.

“Ye kitne ka hain”?

“Sirf Yahin chayiye madam”? He still had that cheeky grin on his face.

Tum chup chap batao nahin toh …..

Her phone started ringing

“The child troubling you Kavita eh? You are getting late my dear, aren’t you?”

“Who’s this?”

Ha! Do you think I am gonna tell you …Anyways Listen …..Take all the things from him. And give him a hundred bucks. Poor kid. We have already paid him 500. Look at him. Doesn’t he look really happy?

Who the ……??

Look up to your right, Will you?

As Kavita looked up she saw her good friend standing at the terrace of a nearby building.A gun pointing to his forehead.

“Naman”

Now you know what to do? Do As I say.

Kavita finally gave in.

Ok now what?

Eh? Good Question.

You didn’t get a bus, did you? Delhi I tell ya. But hey no problem. Take that rickshaw to your left. The poor guy hasn’t got a customer so far. He will be glad to take you to Lodhi Gate.

As she reached Lodhi gate, now what?

“Hello Hello”

The man had disconnected.

The phone rang again. This time it was naman.

“Kavita don’t do anything what these people say …go straight to your office plzz.pl…”

“Eh? Good try Naman Sorry for the disconnection Sweety. The Building to the left of CCD. Somebody will be glad to see you in B-44.”

As Kavita rang the bell, nobody responded. The Door was already open.

“There’s no one here.”

“I know.”

“What?”

“Well what is it near the wall hanging on the left of the television that you see?”

“A Calendar.”

“And what’s the month?”

“What the….. *Shit*”

A loud mixture of Laughs chuckles and giggles filled the room.

Kavita wasn’t too amused.

P.S : A special Thanks to Kirti …If you hadn’t provided the excerpts I wouldn’t have been able to come up with this …I actually didn’t wanna post this here in my blog but as I said I had to come up with something "funny"….It was time…Sowwie :P

Betrayal

Arun, Sudha and Santosh were the best of friends. They always took each other’s advice or suggestions before they took any Important decision in their lives. The whole class envied the trio who always came in the top 3 out of which Sudha always tookthe top honor of the class. In the days gone by however she had developed a liking for arun and so had he.

One day, the H.O.D of the department called santosh who was the Class Representative (C.R) and informed him that their class was selected for an industrial Visit to Goa. Santosh broke the news and the whole class erupted with joy as they had waited forthis for a whole year. And so there they were, the whole class, enjoying the waves and sand of the Baga beach when suddenly the Professor asked “Hey Anybody seen santosh”?? ….No Sir. He was with us but don’t know where he is now.Santosh had gone missing the whole night. He did not even return the next morning. Everybody was worried.The Industrial Visit abruptly came to an end because of this. The College Authorities registered a case with the Goa Police. Arun and Sudha were too shocked to even react as he was the best buddy that they could possibly have.

One day when Sudha was writing her assignment, she got a call…….

“Hello”

“Hi! Sudha You had some real kicka** fun at baga beach, didn’t you? “Eh?

“Who’s this”?

“I have an extremely titillating clip of you and your guy having some real fun at the beach and I am watching it right now

Wow! Hmmm…. “Yum” ….hahaha

“Who’s this…? Who the..?”

I want you to leave a cash of 20 lakhs rupees near the College Gate. If you don’t give me the money then I would send the Mms to everyone through Bluetooth. I will make sure everybody in your college sees it. And you don’t try to do anything smart either. Do this tomorrow understood? At 10.30 am Ok?

But but ……*Phone disconnects*

Sudha was worried, really worried. Where would she get 20 lakhs of rupees from? She could see only one option. She Called up Arun.

What the ….. Who the ….. Ok, well….Listen …Do As I say…Ok?”

So Sudha did what the caller asked her to do. She kept a black Bag near the College premise. A man who had his face covered walked in 5 minutes later. Took the Bag and ran. But when he opened it, there was a kilo of wood and cotton in it. What the …..He turned back but Arun jumped in from behind and wrestled the guy to the ground…As he opened his mask …

Somebody had betrayed him.

Thank You Stephen for the Idea :)

Hope :)

And there she was, clinging on to her big purse on one hand and umbrella on the other, looking beautiful as ever as she headed towards me. I was looking for some company for that last mile and she obliged to join me. Our umbrellas collided all the time as the rain refused to die down. I wanted to start the conversation but I had come to know that her boyfriend had dumped her a few days back and so didn’t want to relive her pain. Instead I wanted to tell her all that was on my mind.

I wanted to tell her how wrong it was for me to be so insecure. How I wished now that she would return to me again. I would do all that it takes to keep the relationship going. Now it would be me who would be responsible for all that would go wrong. But I couldn’t, I could not get in any words. Wouldn’t it be so selfish on my part to convince her now? Why should I want her to believe me?

Finally we reached our destination. It felt weird speechless the whole way. I actually didn’t mind spending everyday outside her house in the pouring rain, just to tell her how I felt. And then in the end I finally managed to utter “Sneha”.She looked at me, it seemed her eyes wanted me to say something all this while. She Waited.

“I ….I……. well….well………”

*A loud nagging noise from somewhere*

“Will you directly have your lunch son?”

“Mom”

As I drove to my office I saw the black clouds gather. It sure would rain heavily I thought.I somehow managed to reach office some 20 minutes late. Boss gave me an angry look which I had somewhat got used to. As I sat on my office chair, my friend cum colleague Sumeet said something in a very hush-hush manner.

“Sorry… what? Didn’t get you?

Dude I said Aditya dumped Sneha!!

I pinched myself.

Listening to:

Yeah, the one that's on my *new and improved* Playlist!!Some of the lyrics are there in the story too :D